Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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