Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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