If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
