I hope mine doesn't look like that
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
