no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
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