He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
