discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Randomize
