operation harelip BJ is a go
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
tell me about the eggs
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
