Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
