i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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