I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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