Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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