Porn is love you can see.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
