im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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