found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
People in love make me want to vomit
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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