Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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