I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
