That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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