i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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