toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
