guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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