He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
