I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize