I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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