A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
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