R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
God, I missed his penis.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
