and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
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i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
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Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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