operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
