these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
