kristin has been a bad kristin
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I could make wine with my vomit
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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