her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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