Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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