how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize