Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+26): View more from

Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY

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(425): View more from Washington

You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.

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(786): View more from Florida

hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(440): View more from Ohio

my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.

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(740): View more from Ohio

I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz

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(779): View more from Illinois

Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.

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(361): View more from Texas

WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?

(903): View more from Texas

I would peed on everything

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(860): View more from Connecticut

How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?

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