Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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