Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Randomize
