i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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