As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
