I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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