no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
