explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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