More tranny stories later!
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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