let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.