Christians are straight up FREAKS
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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