doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Are we still banned from the library?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
