Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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