they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize