Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
