i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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