I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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