i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
